100 Word Song ~ Hotel Illness

This is another entry for  “100 Word Song” initiated by Lance of My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog.

Rules: Write a 100-word story inspired by a song.

This week’s song is The Black Crowe’s “Hotel Illness”.

Follow Lance at @tlanceb on Twitter, and write your own story. It’s fun!
eden

* * * *

I stumbled out of the hut and on to the beach. The sun was setting, and it looked huge–bigger and more fiery than I’d ever seen it. I reached out to touch it and saw my hand push right through it. The orange and red morphed around my fingers and pulled me in. I grabbed it with my fist and ran toward it, holding it as it slowly sunk lower behind the horizon.

An incoming wave splashed my feet and up my ankles. I immediately stopped to watch the water recede. When I looked up, the giant orb had disappeared.

* * * *

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18 Comments

Filed under Writing Joint Ventures

18 responses to “100 Word Song ~ Hotel Illness

  1. t

    I really liked the perspective here. And I love how one sensation so quickly trumped the other.

    And no that you mention it, after commenting, I do feel sexy… =]

    Like

  2. Lance

    This “feels” more than it tells. Like t said, thesensory words are so revealing.

    I like this a lot….

    Like

  3. Eden, You know me well enough to know I don’t follow all the rules of things– mostly because I don’t read them.
    The good news is I usually get unusual things from my mind. I wrote a 100 word song about something I had written- duh. I’ll send it to you or maybe even post it

    Like

  4. Beautiful, Eden. Although I do not know the original song, but your prose gave me a good idea. You painted vivid images with your words so in my mind I could see what you tried to show 🙂

    Interesting, I’m not a chatty person and can be very concise with my words when talking, but when it comes to writing, I tend to go on, hence have not tried this exercise, despite your encouragement.

    Like

    • Junying, all the more reason to do it! Trust me, I am not good with writing within constraints. This exercise does really force you to choose each word carefully and evaluate its necessity in the story. Sign up next Tuesday – Lance does it very week.
      eden

      Like

  5. justinbog

    A good micro-fiction exercise . . . the images resonate, the narrative drives the word painting. I enjoy open-ended stories that come to a definitive end.

    Like

  6. SAM

    Fantastic and so visual, emotional. I enjoyed this.

    Like

  7. I love the heat of reaching into the sun; that’s a powerful feeling right there.

    Like

  8. I love how I could feel the character reaching into the sun and then being splashed back to reality by the waves.

    Like

  9. nice! scorching, even.

    Like

All comments are appreciated.

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